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The Journey Home
Much of this experience was enmeshed within symbols others may have no use for. Therefore, I ask for your patience in consideration of its meaning and intention rather than the words chosen. It may seem very abstract. Please ignore this message if you feel that it is not appropriate for you.
I also ask that, should you feel overwhelmed while contemplating, please seek balance. Feel your feet on the ground, take a slow breath, relax your muscles, drink some clean water, get some fresh air, sit under a tree, try to feel happiness and think constructive thoughts, etc.
I have been hesitant to share this story publicly, but I am told that it is time...
I love learning, for inspired by the insights of others we can feel ecstasy. Long I have felt my studies to be intuitively guided. Ideas would be pointed out to me that felt particularly important. For example, that what you think and feel as an individual is vital for the unfolding of the universe as a whole, that this life is both meaningful and purposeful, and if all things are One, then you already exist inside the One.
I was told inwardly that the source of this reality is synonymous with virtue, and that by attempting to be impeccable in virtue, we may become closer to it. Things that I found profoundly humbling would induce illuminations. Rather than describe the triggers, which may seem trivial, I will describe the sensation: a flash of intense white light would overtake my vision for an incredibly brief moment, a fullness would appear in the center of my head accompanied by a peculiar sensation of warmth, and an uncontrollable flow of tears would commence. After my crying, it felt as if a light breeze was blowing through my eyes.
During a particularly intense amount of studying, I was given an interesting vision: I existed within a void, surrounded by darkness all around. Off in the distance, as if looking at the horizon, a luminous beam of magenta light sped towards me. Even without the sensation of a body, I somehow "caught" the light and flung it from myself as if throwing a boomerang. It curved into a ring, and shifted to a lime-green color. It whistled as it spun, and each time it would return back to me it made a pop. These pops became progressively louder, until the last time it connected, it sounded like an explosion and literally thrust my body forward up and out of bed. At the time, I only had a vague inkling of what it meant.
Sometime later, I was told that there was an incoherence enveloping the Earth, a sort of "shadow" of our collective unconscious. Every time anyone does anything destructive, it adds to it. Some become overwhelmed by it, and this is where the most ghastly, inexplicably "evil" aspects of human behavior find their origin. It is not something that can be destroyed, but must be transmuted by voluntary actions of mutual kindness, caring, and consideration for one another, by a Love that is transcendent. The patterns that were intended to make the constructiveness of this universe self-sustaining had become corrupted through misuse and were in the process of being transformed. Knowledge would come that would help us to realize it. It was like a dense fog being penetrated by a ray of light.
I found it within my purpose to help this transition in any way I could. I tried to learn and share as much as possible about those subjects that seemed important, ways in which we could heal our environment and ourselves, ways in which we could live in unity. I desired that every action would become meditative, and every word would become a prayer. I was not expecting what happened next.
It was right before my late mother's birthday (January 2012). I remember talking to her about an image I had heard about, a painting of a person covered in eyes. What an interesting metaphor! If one was "covered in eyes" then they could take in light from all directions. It would be like the kindling of an inner fire. Light is knowledge. If they could share this knowledge, radiating it out for the benefit of All, it would make that person into a miniature sun.
I wanted very much to find this image, so my mother and I kept searching the Internet for it. We ended up on one particular webpage that had a kind of guided meditation on it. It wasn't what I was looking for. But I've always had great faith in my mother's intuition, and she said that she had a strong feeling that I should read and listen to it. So I sat down, put some headphones on, and started to read as she left the room.
As I read, I was reminded of the idea of being like a cell in a larger being. Everything, even the seemingly inanimate, is alive. When I got closer and closer to the end of the article, I felt a presence greater than myself. When I rose up out of the chair, a field appeared before me, like I was encased inside a large shimmering bubble. On the surface of the bubble were a gigantic pair of eyes, beautiful, kindly eyes that seemed to smile at me. In between them was a vortex. A spiraling ray of light came out of it towards me.
When it connected to my forehead, a high pitched tone that warbled like a gong filled my ears as if a sound was emanating from everywhere all at once, and my visual field waved like ripples traveling through water. An intense vibration started to rush through my body, like it wanted to shake me apart. I was told to let it pass through me to the Earth, and not to try to hold on ot it, that it was for the Earth, and that I should focus on virtue as it worked through blockages within my being. I fell to my knees and automatically thrust my palms upward in supplication. My fingers spread out, and it felt as if the space between my knuckles increased as light streamed out of my fingertips. As it passed through me, I felt a burning sensation on the arches of my feet.
I was so incredibly overwhelmed. I slumped back into a chair and just cried. The energy was so intense that I immediately felt the need to go outside and "ground". I crawled to the front door and out to the front lawn. While on my knees, I started repeatedly rubbing my hands in the dirt underneath a tree, sobbing. I threw my head back and closed my eyes. Stretching out in a vast expanse, I saw a beautiful, gold and purple form that looked like a kind of nebula. Wordlessly, I was told that it was "another plane of existence", one that was perfectly peaceful, and asked if I wanted to go there, to which I replied, "No, I can't leave. I want to bring it here."
By this time, my mother had come outside and had a worried expression on her face. It was late at night and cold. I was told to go back inside and not let my mother worry, that more would
become clear. I made my way inside and sat down on the couch. I tried to explain to her what happened and she seemed to understand. We sat there for awhile until she got up to go to bed. She asked me if I was going to bed, and I said that I would after I wrote some things out.
While I sat there typing out what I could of the experience, I received another vision. This time it was what I can only describe as "the spirit of the Earth". We are tethered to the core of the Earth by a kind of energetic anchor. It told me that it arises out of the Earth and is expressed through our individual bodies by means of our DNA, through the "unlocking of our genetic memories", the knowledge that is inherent to our body. It connects to the base of our brain, the "most primitive" part, and creates a link between our two hemispheres keeping our logic and intuition in balance through our instinct.
I was also told that we are akin to the "child" of "Cosmic Parents", the "masculine" and "feminine" principles that operate throughout reality together as One. While the "Father" can be reached through logic, the "Mother" operates differently and must be embraced through intuition. After this, I went to bed.
The next morning I heard this "spirit of the Earth" tell me to do various things. Some of it might seem mundane, like to get dressed and eat breakfast, but other things were oddly specific. For example, I was told to go outside and "wait for a sign." When I went outside, I stood in the middle of the yard, and almost immediately, pigeon droppings plopped down on the ground about 1 foot away directly in front of me. I began to laugh. I was told, "This is your first lesson. You do not always have to go somewhere. Because Mind exists everywhere, you can travel
without moving. Go back inside." So I went back into the house.
From this point on, I was guided to do a sort of complicated meditation that consisted of imagining myself within a box that had vortices on each face. I was to trace out spirals on my palms and gyrate my body to follow these vortices in a particular pattern. To be honest, it is likely that these steps would be unique to each person, and it seems pointless to dwell too much on the details of all this. Then, I was to lay down on the ground with my head pointed north, and imagine lines of light traveling along the surface of the Earth and connecting within me.
When I did this, another vision overwhelmed my senses. A giant bird-like energy rose up out of the Earth. It was like a fiery "Phoenix", but with a kind of "Peacock's tail". I grabbed on to it, and it flew towards the center of the Earth. The center of the Earth connected to the poles which ran like a multi-colored cable of light towards the equator of the Sun. When I asked what this was, a name appeared, "The Rainbow Bridge".
This cable connected to the core of the Sun, and from the poles of the Sun, to the center of the Galaxy in a great chain. When I got past the Galaxy I saw something that looked like a giant
triangle of light whose edges were bowed inwardly. On each corner was a different galaxy. I believe that they were the Milky Way, Andromeda, and the Triangulum Galaxies. Each time I wondered about what I was seeing, another name appeared. This was called "The Triskelion".
Each hop from the Earth, to the Sun, to the Galaxy, to this triangle formation, lead to an increase in speed, until at that point, it felt like moving "infinitely fast". A black tunnel opened up and undulating patterns of light started to dance around within it. Each of them had names. When I asked what was happening, I was told that they function like "keys to get through the gate". Only coherence was allowed to pass through. As "The Phoenix" and I neared the end of the tunnel, it felt like we were progressively narrowing into a tight beam. At the end of the tunnel was a iridescent sphere, "The Pearl".
As soon as we touched it, everything seemed to invert. I was flying backwards through a void, looking down at "The Pearl", instead of flying towards it. "The Phoenix" was gone, but a giant
"Dragon" like figure flew out of "The Pearl" towards me. "The Dragon" moved past me, slithering through the void. Within the curves of its body, the blackness of space started to swirl and
become countless stars. I was told, "By dreaming a new dream, you will find your new home."
It is incredibly hard to recount this story in words, as every time I think about it I cry uncontrollably. Even now as I type, I am sobbing. This is what our universe is becoming, an
absolute, indescribable perfection. Each and every single one of us will get to experience it, and I humbly and sincerely look forward to that moment when you experience it for yourself if you haven't already. I believe all of us will have experiences that will help lead us there, ones that are just right for you as an individual, things that will be just as special and important to you as this experience was for me. Each of us is meant to be a bridge for the perfection of The One to become manifest. Our destiny is greater than any words could ever contain, and I desire to do everything within my power to help facilitate it.
With that, I came back to my body.
The following days, more experiences came. I was guided to do many more things, some of which I am sure seemed absolutely psychotic to those around me, but felt necessary so as to humble me. All of this is a gift of which I could never have earned. Oftentimes, it seems that after these experiences we might be inclined to think that it is our task to single-handedly "save the world" or that we are one of the "chosen". This sort of arrogance is a distortion, as everyone is a vital component of its manifestation, none excluded. Each thing you do, no matter how seemingly trivial, is helping it along. And if it is constructive, all the quicker it unfolds, and the more enjoyable the process for everyone. It is pointless to compare people, for each person is unique. No one is more or less than any other.
By talking to you, I am talking to myself. And in this, I knew Oneness. The boundaries of my being disappeared and all I felt was One.
At times I would forget, such as when overwhelmed with grief at the death of my mother, or worry about what I would do with my life without the support of my family. However, each moment is a time to remember so that we might live in Oneness continuously. Imagine that, like the symbols within a dream, every experience we have is telling us something important. A pleasant song, a beautiful piece of art, a laugh, a smile, the warmth of the sun, the caress of the breeze, the swaying of the trees, all these little things helping to guide you back to the One which you never left.
So it is in this I pray, that you come to know The One as yourself.
Thank you for reading! ♥